A while ago I realized that it is not situations but rather people that I can react to – Because if someone I feel good about does something, it doesn’t bother me, but if someone I don’t like does the same thing, I may think, “What an awful thing to do.”
Intellectually I have come to understand that the reason I don’t like certain people is simply that they reflect certain characteristics in myself that I would rather not know about.
I was hoping that gradually, deep inside, I would come to accept this rather unpalatable fact, and that my judgments would miraculously disappear without my having to face anything unpleasant in myself. Unfortunately, so far this hasn’t happened. I still react strongly to some people, and find it difficult sometimes even to remember to turn my energy into watching myself rather than judging. I have been comforting…
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